Kimberly Schlapman spends the night on stage with her bandmates from country band Little Big Town. Her fans also know her as a passionate home cook, frequently posting videos of her latest kitchen creations. She even has her own cookbook! But when she’s not on stage or cooking delicious food, she’s caring for her mother, Barbara Bramlett, who has Parkinson’s disease.
“My mother was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease 21 years ago, and at the time our family had no idea what everything involved with this disease,” Schlapman said.
At the time, her mother was living a really normal life, with some tremors and a few other symptoms that the family later realized were related to the disease. Her mother’s hand tremor occurred when Schlapman’s first husband died unexpectedly of a heart attack, so the family quickly dismissed it due to the stress of grief. But her mother began to notice that her left arm stopped shaking during her regular 3.5-mile walks with her best friend.
Looking back on his childhood, Schlapman recalled that his mother suffered from night terrors. “And now we know that it’s REM sleep disorder that comes with Parkinson’s disease.”
Schlapman was in the studio with the band when he received a call from his mother, who said she thought he had Parkinson’s disease. “What about me? Parkinson’s disease?”
“And she said, ‘Yes, I studied a lot.’”
Bramlett went to a neurologist and his suspicions were confirmed.
“Her diagnosis was a surprise to all of us at first, but it really didn’t have that much of an impact on her life,” Schlapman said. “But as it has evolved over the last seven or eight years, it has really reached another level and her life has become much more different.”
Gets worse over time
Schlapman said her mother was just like her before her diagnosis. “Always go to work, work a lot, take care of everyone around you… Now this disease has really, really changed her life. As it progresses, it takes over everything at this point,” Schlampan said.
Bramlett is committed to physical therapy and is always working diligently to manage her symptoms. In addition to physical therapy, she tries to maintain a healthy diet and continue to exercise.
“She is taking Parkinson’s medication to help manage her symptoms,” Schlapman said. “But her case is very advanced. She has Parkinson’s disease, so a lot of the things that dictate her day are out of her control. But her spirit is amazing.”
The importance of early diagnosis and communication
Witnessing Parkinson’s disease firsthand taught Schlapman the importance of recognizing symptoms early. “I think early detection is very important because there are things you can do physically to delay the effects or progression of the disease,” she said. To spread awareness, Schlapman partnered with AbbVie’s “Changing the Tune of Parkinson’s Disease” campaign to empower both patients and caregivers to advocate for themselves and explore treatment options that meet their specific needs.
Because Parkinson’s disease has a variety of symptoms, it is important to notify your health care provider (HCP) of any new health changes. “That’s why this campaign encourages people to consult their doctor. There’s no symptom that shouldn’t be mentioned,” she said.
Schlampan has seen how modern treatments, such as the anti-tremor medication her mother was prescribed, can make a meaningful difference. But the first step in managing your symptoms is to give your health care provider a hint. “It’s never too early and never too late to talk to your doctor about new symptoms and whether they’re related to Parkinson’s disease. Because Parkinson’s disease is individualized, your doctor can create a plan that’s as perfect as possible for the specific individual living with this disease.”
Finding Balance as a Caregiver
In addition to being a daughter, Schlapman is also a musician, chef, wife, and mother of two. Juggling everything and caring for her mother is definitely a lot, she admitted. But she was grateful to be able to be so involved in her mother’s care.
“Like women and moms everywhere, we have a lot going on. We have a lot of plates in the air and that’s what we do. God made us multitaskers, so we try to take care of ourselves as much as we can while taking care of others,” she said.
Schlampan believes it’s important for caregivers to find ways to care for themselves. On a personal note, she continues her passion for cooking, often preparing meals for her mother and assisting her in the kitchen.
Schlapman’s brother and sister are also active in the practice, and the siblings work together to fully understand their mother’s symptoms and treatment protocols. “I think it’s very important for caregivers to have someone they can share everything with and download to,” Schlapman said. She emphasized that there is definitely a level of sadness in caregiving because the person you are caring for is not the person you have known forever. They have changed.
“So I realize that I am a person who has always known my mother and is grieving, but celebrating the fact that she is still here and a little fighter,” she said. What has helped Schlapman the most is staying in constant communication with her siblings.
“When she’s having a bad day and we’re with her, we call each other and say:
‘This happened today.’
‘It was really hard.’
‘I was really sad.’
‘It was really frustrating.’
Schlapman wants caregivers to remind themselves that they are human and that it’s okay to feel frustrated. “If a caregiver is feeling frustrated, they shouldn’t feel alone because it happens to everyone,” she said.
Schlapman recognizes the challenges of the Sandwich Generation, raising children while caring for aging parents. No one has ever talked to her about these issues, and she believes this is a topic that needs to be talked about more so people can prepare each other for what lies ahead. “Even though my mother cared for her own mother who had breast cancer, she didn’t really talk about it much,” she said. “So I think it’s really important for all of us to talk to each other and remember to take care of yourself because if you’re not in shape you can’t take care of anyone else.”
Watching her mother battle Parkinson’s disease inspired Schlapman to make changes to her own health. “I’m watching what my mother is going through, and I want to prepare my body as much as possible in case I have to walk the same or another difficult path.”
Schlapman has been focusing on strength training to protect herself from falls, and has seen both of her parents struggle. “And as I got older, I realized how important it was to be strong,” she said.
Meanwhile, she continues to defend her mother. “I was with my mom at her neurologist appointment this week, and we mentioned some new things, so the doctor made some really small changes,” she said. “My mom’s doctor is like that. They make very small changes and see if they work, and when they see the effects of those small changes, they can make bigger changes. And that’s just trying to make my mom’s quality of life a little bit better.”
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